Car Crash
by LittleJeevas
Summary: Their fight. His words. Their tears. His death. MxM Oneshot. Language.


**AN: this is a oneshot about a really depressing way that Matt dies. But it gets better at the end so don't worry. Reviews make my day ;D**

**Oh by the way, if you listen to Shadow of the Day by Linkin Park when you read this, it makes the story more emotional. Or better? Haha. Listen.**

"Holy shit Mello, stop being such a fucking baby!" I couldn't help yelling.

"Oh I'm sure you'd be doing the same right now if I broke one of your games, so don't be calling me a baby."

"All I wanted was a night alone with you without hearing a word of Near or god damned Kira.. But could Matt have that? No, he couldn't." I was about ready to leave.

"You know how much it means to me though. I have to be number one. Matt you've always understood this." He looked at me with pleading yet hatred filled eyes.

"Yeah but have you ever thought about how I feel about it? No. I've always hated when you devote all of your time to Kira. Do I even mean anything to you? Have I ever? And you always talk about Near. Maybe you should just go run along and fuck him instead. I'm sure you guys could talk about what plan of action you'll initiate next. Fucking god Mello, really." I was holding back tears thinking about Mello and Near but I had to say it.

Mello, finally speechless, just stared at me. I think I won. Those thoughts quickly dwindled away when his fist made contact with my cheekbone, throwing me back against the wall. My eyes fluttered and I gained tunnel vision. There was a rim of black fog around my line of sight.

Mello was enshrouded with a halo of black smoke.

His face seemed almost worried when I didn't get up. I scoffed a little, then made my way back to my feet.

"You son of a bitch.." I stumbled and leant on the back of the couch. "Just because you know I'm right doesn't give you a reason to deck me in the face." Saying this, I reached up to my cheekbone and felt a warm stickiness. _God dammit. _I thought he had enough self restraint to not make me bleed.

"Matt, I didn't mean to hurt you, but you made me. You know I would never do that with Near."

"How do I know that!" I was fuming. "You don't even see why I'm upset god dammit. You never spend any fucking time with me anymore. What if I die tomorrow? Huh? Then I'm gonna be gone forever and you'll never see me again. But I'm sure you wouldn't care now would you. As long as you beat stupid Near. Any means necessary right?"

Mello was speechless again, but didn't have the look in his eye that he gets when he hits me.

".. Matt, I have to beat him. I must surpass him and L. I want to spend time with you bu-". I cut him off.

"Save it. Tell me when I'm dead." I couldn't take this anymore. I gathered my vest and lit a cigaret. Before i left though, I captured the back of Mello's head with my hand and slammed my lips to his. The kiss didn't feel loving like ours usually did. This was full of anger. Good.

I parted our lips and stalked off with out looking back. I could feel Mello's eyes on my back as I hesitated at the door knob. I didn't know if my decision was the right one but I had to leave for now. I'd be back. I knew it. I always came back. He knew that too. But I couldn't help this nagging feeling in my stomach that leaving at this moment was a horrible idea.

I began to fight back tears when I turned the door knob and said "Dont follow me."

I knew Mello was just standing there. I knew he wouldn't do anything. At most he'd probably call me telling me to come back. Psh, yeah right, just to ignore me. I don't think so.

With my cigaret still burning in my hand, I started down the stairs. I didn't have a clue as to where I was going. I never did.

I couldn't stop the tears now. When I got to the bottom, to the glass doors of the shitty apartment building I called home, I broke. I scrunched down, resembling a certain detective that had passed a few years ago. I cried into my knees and fell into the door, pushing it open slightly. It was at this time that I realized it was raining, when I felt drops landing on my already damp cheeks.

There I laid, for a good twenty minutes. I cried my eyes out until they were sore and red and stung of Mello sadness.

I don't remember getting in my car, or much after that. Only the painful parts.

I guess I drove for fifteen minutes to the downtown area of LA. It was still raining. Of course.

I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket, picking up I figured it was Mello. Which it was, judging by the caller ID.

"What." I tried to sound as if I hadn't been crying for the past forty five minutes.

"Come back."

"So you can ignore me some more? I don't think so."

"Im not going to ignore you. I never ignored you. I always noticed your presence."

"Oh bullshit Mello, you wouldn't acknowledge me even if I were waving my dick in your face." This was probably true. On the other end I could hear him scoff and huff.

"Matt, you knew I'd be like this from the beginning so don't even try to act as if it is a surprise. Sure you're my only friend, and the love of my life, but L was my mentor. I must avenge him. Don't you understand that?" He was almost yelling.

"You know what, I guess I don't." I was yelling. "Thats all you fucking think about, you know that? Remember last week, when I baked that cake? When I was asking you, no begging you, to stop working? Remember that? Guess what day that was.. " I let him guess.

"Matty I'm so sorry. I can't believe if forgot. I feel like such an idiot." I could hear him crying now.

"Bullshit Mello, you're not sorry. You're just saying that. When was the last time you even told me you loved me? And i can count on one hand the times you did something nice for me." God dammit Mello, I don't want to yell.

"..." I hadn't noticed that my car had stopped in the middle of an intersection.

"Got nothing to say do you? I thought so." i hadn't noticed that cars were beeping at me as they passed.

"Matt, I just want to tell you that I realize now that all of what you are saying is true. Every word." I hadn't noticed that two large lights were getting larger as the got closer through the rain.

"I said save it Mello. Just say it, you don't love me. You never have. But I've always loved you.." I hadn't noticed that those were the last words I said to Mello as the large semi-truck hit my side of the car. It hadn't seen me through the heavy downpour.

I didn't hear Mello say anything after that. I was pinned in the drivers seat. My neck snapped and i died instantly. I really was a depressing sight after all. Blood dripped from my skull, legs were broken, face bruised and coated red. Faint tear streaks interrupted my red face. I had been crying as I died I guess.

My ghost, well, me right now, watched over my body. I watched as people drenched with rain water crowded around my totaled car. They didn't know who I was. They didn't know why I died. They didn't know that I never wanted to leave my boyfriend's house. They didn't know that the blond man standing in the front of the crowd was the man I loved.

I noticed Mello speeding on his motorcycle in my direction. How did he know where I was? Oh well, that doesn't matter. All that matters now is that I'll never be able to talk to him again.. To tell him I'm sorry. To tell him I love him.

"MATT?" Mello burst through the crowd and just stared at my head leaning out the car's broken window. I saw that he too was coated in rain. His blond hair was sticking to his cheeks as he ran to my dead body. No one stopped him. Not even the police men.

"Matt? Matty? Wake up, please wake up, please!" I walked closer to him as I noticed he started to cry. Almost hysterically. I was standing in front of him now. Facing him as he bent down over my bleeding face. I reached out and brushed my fingers across his cheek.

"Im sorry," I whispered. I didn't know what else to say. I wish he could hear me.

"Matt.. Oh god, Matty. I'm so sorry." He kissed my cut forehead. His tears rolled down his cheeks and into my hair. He looked so distraught. I couldn't take it. I wanted so badly to just hold him one last time.

At this point, I had completely forgotten why I was mad at him in the first place. With the rain falling around us, everyone in the crowd had disappeared, though they were still there. Just staring at Mello, grieving over my dead body.

"Matt, please come back. Please don't be dead.. I love you. I love you so much Matt. I love you with everything that I have." The rain kept falling. At this point I was kneeling in front of him. I guess I can't get wet because not a drop of water has fallen upon me yet.

"Mello, I love you too. God do I love you. I should have never left." Forgive me, please.

"Forgive me Matt. For everything, please." He kissed my forehead and then my cold lips. Fuck, Mello. I looked at him longingly.

"Matt, I'll be with you soon. I cant stand life without you. Already, it's a living hell. Don't worry, you'll see me soon."

What is he thinking? He can't kill himself. He just can't. He is supposed to live a long, wonderful life. I saw him stand. Place one last kiss on my lips and cradled my head, then walked back to his motorcycle. I followed.

I watched as he went up the stairs to our apartment.

I watched as he opened the door.

I watched as he made his way to our bed room and opened the dresser drawer.

I watched as he pulled out his gun.

"Mello, don't, please!" I cried, but still just stood there and watched.

And finally, I watched as he put the icy barrel to his temple.

"I love you Matt!" Mello cried as I watched him pull the trigger. After that I closed my eyes.

I heard a loud shot.. Then a thud. That would be his body. Oh god.

"Oh Mello," I began as tears ran down my bloody cheeks. He was gone.

I hadn't opened my eyes until I felt two arms wrap around my waist from behind.

"I love you Matt. Now I can show you."

**AN: Depressing huh? Well I give you a snippet of happiness at the end there.**

**So, this is originally supposed to be a oneshot but if I get enough reviews, i might make a sequel. So I'm leaving it up to you.**

**But I do love reviews. Reviews make Matt and Mello happy in the sequel :D**

**Reviewww.**


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